the plan

School will begin for the 9th time for me and this time i have an escape plan : the event will be shorter to me because i will skip some parts of it. i live near the school and i will go near my school and sit on a bench and when i see the first group of people ,whose destination is school ,i will walk to school behind them. Then i am going to wait my class to arrive in front of the math classroom. if they ask questions about the absence of me, i would say that i forgot and that i just came here right away -this is my master plan.

I really hate the first days of school because they are awkward in essence and i can already feel the anxiety ,that never leaves, it just hides in my subconscious world and gives me the claustrophobic vibe ,when there are people ,who i used to know. i usually walk away in a fast tempo or hide.

i fell asleep and i was surrounded by all the 9th graders ,we are near the police station ,in front of us ,there is this river that in real life is as big as in my dream. There was a line and i was the next one to jump to the river, i said that i was not going to do that and they started talk like ''yeah ,we should of know''  but somehow i did it and i was happy: this was the weird dream i had one day ,i've had dreams like this for the whole summer.they bug me and i need an appointment to the madhouse but i can't because my doctor is on vacation.